...//butterfly

i've titled this "butterfly" because that's what i'll become after a year in a cocoon...

...what do i mean by this exactly?

...after much thought and discussion i've come to a mutual agreement with t | z | m

for me to have a future... i need to be healthy...

not just in body, but in mind and spirit too...

.... i've been sick

... for a long time

... ignoring the warning signs

...not tending to the mary

...working the martha to death

...and before the horse has been beaten to the ground, i'm gonna take a season to heal...

...in other words

... i'm coming off the road for a year

//it's not a bad thing at all

i could continue in the state that i'm in, but it would do me no good and by the time i am 30 i would be physically sick to the point where i could not minister at all...

i would be emotionally sick and spiritually sick to the point where it would be too late...

my priorities did not stay straight...

not to say that i've jumped into a world of sin, but i've been having an affair with myself...

like choosing me over God...

to the point where i want to do what i want to do and that's doing nothing at all...

... i don't want to be sick anymore

...i want to get that glean back in my eye where i'm so madly in love with Jesus, He's all you see

...you may not agree with that, but you only see the outside

...no one has seen the part in me that's been dying

...after all, if you're not growing, you're dying

and that's exactly where i'm at...

i haven't grown in a long time...

...sure there's been some growth, i've been involved in a world shaking revival ministry and no one can go to the places we've been in the Spirit and come out the same

...but it's time for my personal relationship to get fixed

i was reading John Maxwell's book

"Be A People Person"

last night and it hit me plain and simple...

the most important thing is my relationship with God...

then to take care of my family...

then ministry...

so this year...

i'm gonna take care of my relationship with God... get my priorities back in line

i'm gonna help my family...

then... ministry

it's a hard break... it's not easy to leave... but it's for the good...

lets put it this way

if i was a wounded quarterback and i keep throwing interceptions, not seeing my blindsides, ignoring the ones around me to protect me and my coach telling me what to fix, i'll injure myself to the point of hurting my career as a quarterback... but i have an awesome coach who sees that i need to take a season and let the injury heal correctly, go through some rehab to make my arm stronger than before and then come back strong, healed and ready for a longer career then Brett Farve...

...for me to have a future, i need a year to heal... get stronger... get some rehab... and come back

full

full of passion for Christ

so... that's the big news

that's the best news i could ever get...

i'm grateful to be working with a ministry that sees the blindsides, holds you accountable, and would rather hold on to me for the long haul by letting me go for a short time...

...i'm not leaving forever... i'm taking a selah... a pause and reflect on what God is saying...

this will be a good year

a great year...

...the best year of my life

...and when i come out of this cocoon... it's going to be the best time of our lives

i'll be the prettiest little butterfly you've ever seen :)

ha ha

so to all my friends in the tzm world... i'll be around... not as much... but i'm still here...

life is a marathon... not a sprint...

...and on that note

...ciao'